Today has been a really special day getting to welcome my brand new nephew into the world. After visiting with him and my sister, I had a chance to have a one-on-one call with coach Kharisma Aro! I won this call as part of expansion week for Expansion LIVE! that is happening at the end of the month in Banff (can you tell I am super excited about this event!?!?) Kharisma helped me with some clarity around my life purpose and we talked a bit about childhood in the call. This theme around childhood connected with the group tapping with Jackie McDonald tonight where we considered our inner little girl. I realized I have lots to work on with my inner child. The biggest takeaway from both of these events tonight is that there are things we have been told as a child that we start to own as part of our identity.
An example from my life is as a child I auditioned to be part of a choir, and wasn't selected to be a member. I was told something at that time, but my inner girl owned it as "I am not good enough" and "I am not good at singing." This inner dialogue defined much of the next decade of my life. I truly believed that I was not good at singing even though this was something that I really very much enjoyed. I can list off a great number of events like this where comments were made, or things happened and I learned the negative. Now as an adult, I am working through these comments and realising the impact of our inner voice, and the power we give to the voices of others. This revelation really is transformational. I now have the power to change, and to work through these limiting beliefs simply by realizing how little power they actually hold. What types of stories, and limiting beliefs have come from your childhood?
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I've been digging deep lately and doing some soul searching. I realize there is a much bigger calling in the world then what I am currently doing. Here is some of the big things I have learned about myself lately.
1. I love wine. No.... really. Wine has given me the gift of learning about mindfulness in a very tactile way. When you have wine, you learn to look at it critically, smell it, and really taste it. It helps for me to get some perspective, and really focus in on what is in front of me through the time I am doing a tasting. I have learned to use more words to describe wine, to discern the difference in colour, taste, and qualities. This process has applied to many more pieces of my life where I have really started to see things from a different perspective. 2. Expressive arts rock! My first degree is in music and music has truly been an important part of my life since I was born. I've always been into creation and really working on crafting projects and jewelry creation. In my adulthood I haven't appreciated the power of arts as much but its come back. I wouldn't consider myself an artist, but I have been painting, drawing, and creating. It has been a powerful way for self exploration, out letting emotions, and coming together with others. 3. Yep..... you do need to sweat. I know some people say they want it known that they "sparkle" not sweat... but oh, let's be real..... it's important to exercise and really sweat. I've been working on virtual running races for a few years. First with the Hogwarts Running Club, and now I am really jiving with Stars Hollow Running Club and Chilton Running Club. I guess it's just that I really love Gilmore Girls, the money being donated to charity, and the pretty bling that I earn! I'm about 90 km's behind in my races, even after I knocked down almost 20 km's this week. I'm really diving into making this walking/running thing a regular occurance. It makes me feel better physically and emotionally. 4. Essential Oils are one of the most important parts of my rituals and days. I start my morning with a routine of essential oils, I use them to support healing, and love the smell to uplift my mood. I found doTerra quite a few years ago now, and have been using them regularly. I'm not sure what I would do with out them! In addition, the peppermint beadlets are my other fav thing - I mean you wouldn't want bad breath! 5. I've always been a black sheep, and quite frankly I am now embracing the fact that I am different, and wonderful all at once. Life would be boring if we were all the same, and I am really stoked to forge my path and find other black sheep along the way. What have you learned about yourself lately? I've been working around a lot of judgement within myself over the past year. What that means is that I have been consciously noticing when I am judging myself and working to amend that with positive affirmations. It certainly has been quite the task because as you can imagine we seem conditioned from a young age what we should look like, act like, etc. This is problematic because we are all unique, and need to be our authentic self. I have been finding success in my daily task of working towards non-judgement.
The next hurdle is in processing the judgement that one hears from people around us. Yesterday I had a conversation with a person who made some sweeping judgement comments. As I was relaxing at home, I was trying to process the judgement of this person. I realize today that the judgement I felt from this person was an opportunity for me to practice non-judgement. To practice working on the things that have come up for me, and ultimately let it go. I can't control the thoughts of those around me, and I can't stop them from the judgmental comments. I can only control my reaction... and I choose to see judgment as an opportunity for me to look within, to see what I need to work on, and use it as a loving growth opportunity. I just finished my first 40 day challenge.
After epic-ly failing every other time I have tried it..... I dived in head first with another 40 day challenge. I was able to get past my ego, my perfectionism, and self-doubt and succeeded. Yes... I have made it past 40 days of blissfully flossing my teeth. We in the spiritual world get all tied up about what our 40 day practice will be about.... meditation, yoga, or whatever..... but, truly my first 40 day success is about something simpler. Just simply flossing my teeth. It is now a part of my every day, a piece of time that I enjoy focussing on oral hygiene, and knowing I am doing something for myself. So...... what is next. Good question...... I need to find another 40 day quest. Something that illuminates me, something that moves me forward. Any ideas? When you are in a busy situation and get focussed on a goal the first thing that can happen is to ignore taking care of yourself. I know that this happens very often for me. I need to remind myself about self-care and focus on building some small pieces of self-care into my day. Sometimes that looks different then other days. Here are some of the top little pieces of self-care that I use to help myself feel grounded.
1. A cup of tea - The process of preparing, enjoying and drinking a cup or pot of tea helps me to feel grounded. My personal favourites right now include Creme of Earl Grey and Chocolate Macaroon. 2. Enjoying the smell of essential oils - I personally prefer doTERRA essential oils and in particular a blend called Balance. I will put some in a diffuser, or rub a few drops on my hands and place them over my nose and inhale deeply. 3. Practice Deep Breathing - I will sit up straight, and ensure to take long deep breaths focussing on expanding the diaphram and my tummy! I work to lengthen the inhale, hold and exhale. 4. Get some movement in! - I have started to really dig long walks, and going for a run! I listen to my body as to what it can handle. Somedays I walk, somedays I run. Sometimes I cry, grunt, or chat affirmations while moving. It may look goofy, but I find moving helps to release negative emotions and get it all out! 5. Water - Drink it, don't be afraid to be in the rain, or go for a swim. There is something cleansing about water. 6. Creativity - build something, paint, or even one of those adult colouring books. I also love zentangle. 7. Meditation - I will sit in silence. I love to be out in the rain meditating, but find it works great anywhere. Some of my favourites include touching thumb to each finger with the words "Peace Begins With Me" or doing Ego Eradicator with Breath of Fire (google it!). 8. Reading a book - Sometimes getting into a different head space involves experiencing another world. 9. Laugh - a funny movie, or time with a good friend can help us with this. Laughing makes you feel better. 10. EFT - I use tapping to chill out often. It is so versatile and you can do it anywhere! Check out Nick and Jessica Ortner and their work. They have some great books on the topic. Self-care is essential... we are best able to be the light when we have taken care of ourselves first! Share some of the ways that you like to take care of yourself below! In the midst of Mercury Retrograde and all of the craziness that it brings, I was brought to tears by the way the universe works for me. Yesterday I was supposed to run my first 5k. Well, it was supposed to be my 2nd 5k. See the first one was scheduled for April, and then we got 30 cm of snow and it was cancelled. I felt a bit behind in training for this one due to my trip to Europe, but I was eager to get rolling. I happened to be on call for the Sexual Assault Center at a just past 7 a.m. I got a call to go out to the hospital to support a survivor. At first, I was upset and frustrated, but then I realized that the universe had a bigger plan for me, and now, I can see that is most definitely the case. I was well needed, and it's ok I am batting 0/2 on 5k's. I have two more scheduled, and am not on call. It will happen! I do appreciate the amount of support from people along the way.
10 more days of Mercury Retrograde! Today marks 70 years since the liberation of Auschwitz. I feel a shiver through my body today just typing that out. This morning I tuned into the live commemoration that took place today at Auschwitz. The big things that keeps coming through my mind.... is what drives a human being to do this to other human beings.
What drives humans closer together.... or so far apart to dehumanize each other? I'm not sure that I can conceptionalize what drives people to this level.... but I do know, that the positive vibrations that we put out are a way that we can continue to the opposition to those negative vibrations. One of those things that keep cropping up for me is jealousy and other less-than-ideal vibes.
Sometimes when you are beginning a spiritual journey you fall off the spiritual path. This happens to me frequently! I get inspired, and start moving in a positive spiritual direction. Then somewhere along the way I lose it, and mess up the practice. This has been an ongoing challenge for me, and one which has taught me alot.
First of all, I know that even though I keep falling off the journey, that I am still making positive progress. How do I know this? Well the first place I notice this is on the yoga mat. I have been doing Kundalini yoga for almost 2 years. When I started, I had difficulty sitting in Easy Pose. I had difficulty focusing for more than a couple seconds in meditation. Last night was Kundalini Yoga night, and I sat with little difficulty, and meditation has become way easier (and way more rewarding!). Second, even when I fall off the journey, I still am noticing and aware of things in my environment. On the weekend I was teaching adults and was very aware of negative vibes and energy around me. I am still struggling to protect myself from that energy, but I am very aware it is going on and am doing my best not to feed into that energy (oh! Did I ever love feeding drama before this journey!). I have realized that I need to be kind to myself... we aren't perfect and we fall off the path sometimes. The best thing is to just get back on and keep going. That can be tough, but ultimately it is what is most rewarding. What are the ways that you get back to your spiritual path? I have felt off kilter, and have fallen off the positive daily routines that I was working to develop. So, I went into the area of my house with my altar. Burnt some sweetgrass scented incense and pulled out my Osho Zen Tarot Cards. I did a Past, Present, Future reading.
Past - Suppression - This definitely didn't suprise me... that in the past I have been suppressing emotions. One of the things I have been working on - in particular since seeing Mastin Kipp is feeling my feelings. It is tough at times, and lots of tears have been shed... but I feel better. More uplifted. Present - The Source - Again, really connected with this... that I am sensing my source, my light, right now. That is definitely the case. Future - Ripeness - That I am on the start of a creative path. Oooo, the sense of possibility. I put on my favourite rosary... put some serenity oil on my chest.... and really about to dive in on some meditation and tapping, before snuggling into my nice warm bed. |
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May 2017
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